Ahh, Just Kidding...
Dear ____________ College,
The following are the reasons why ____________ College is the college for me. Please just fill in the appropriate college name on the blank.
1.) After googling ___________ College, I was very pleased to find that the homepage was very colorful and well kept. A very inspiring song played in the background as I looked at pictures of the campus. I like pictures.
2.) I had a chance to visit ____________ College and found the campus atmosphere to be very friendly. Someone from the school—a squirrel actually—was kind enough to sit next to me on one of the benches. It was very thoughtful and offered to give me the bubonic plague.
3.) The classes at ____________ College are outwardly delightful. After sitting in on a poetry class, I found that they are also quite restful. According to some of the attending students, the most desired spot to be is behind the trashcan, next to the door, where there is even enough space to lie down.
4.) ____________ College has lovely Rodin Sculpture. A college with tasteful lawn ornaments must be good.
5.) ____________ College has a tightly knit community. The dorm size is cozy enough to bring roommates together. On top of one another, as a matter of fact.
6.) The ____________ College teachers are so young and inexperienced that they blend right into their own classes, making the student-teacher relationship very strong. Both student and teacher must work together to make any sense of the material.
7.) ____________ College is strong enough academically to bless its students with flattering nervous habits such as nail biting, hair twisting, fidgeting, flogging, incessant finger tapping, and twitching.
8.) The student body at ____________ College is kept at a reasonable number. The avid bikers around the campus successfully weed out the weak ones.
9.) The food offered at ____________ College is in-edible and insures that the local restaurants will be supported.
10.) I have heard good things from ____________ College graduates. My neighbor decided to attend after watching an attractive student go for a jog. Time well spent, indeed.
The following are the reasons why ____________ College is the college for me. Please just fill in the appropriate college name on the blank.
1.) After googling ___________ College, I was very pleased to find that the homepage was very colorful and well kept. A very inspiring song played in the background as I looked at pictures of the campus. I like pictures.
2.) I had a chance to visit ____________ College and found the campus atmosphere to be very friendly. Someone from the school—a squirrel actually—was kind enough to sit next to me on one of the benches. It was very thoughtful and offered to give me the bubonic plague.
3.) The classes at ____________ College are outwardly delightful. After sitting in on a poetry class, I found that they are also quite restful. According to some of the attending students, the most desired spot to be is behind the trashcan, next to the door, where there is even enough space to lie down.
4.) ____________ College has lovely Rodin Sculpture. A college with tasteful lawn ornaments must be good.
5.) ____________ College has a tightly knit community. The dorm size is cozy enough to bring roommates together. On top of one another, as a matter of fact.
6.) The ____________ College teachers are so young and inexperienced that they blend right into their own classes, making the student-teacher relationship very strong. Both student and teacher must work together to make any sense of the material.
7.) ____________ College is strong enough academically to bless its students with flattering nervous habits such as nail biting, hair twisting, fidgeting, flogging, incessant finger tapping, and twitching.
8.) The student body at ____________ College is kept at a reasonable number. The avid bikers around the campus successfully weed out the weak ones.
9.) The food offered at ____________ College is in-edible and insures that the local restaurants will be supported.
10.) I have heard good things from ____________ College graduates. My neighbor decided to attend after watching an attractive student go for a jog. Time well spent, indeed.
posted by Integrity at 5:11 PM
3 Comments:
Heh heh... good times. Remember our get-away vespa? :)
Rofl! So THIS is the stuff all my senior friends are having to deal with!
Yes! It's sooo poopy!
i really have to write stuff like that about places i don't know squat about... of course i have to do it with more...(pauses to think of an accurate word) lies than what i just mentioned. butterflys and rainbow lies :) it's not too terrible i suppose... i just have to have a (pause) stairing contest with the brightside. it has to go from poopy to poppy... if i want to be admitted, that is.
the actual funny part about that is that it was all true! just not for one college. i had all those experiences at different colleges that i visited.
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