The Bottle Speak Of Mischief

This is the majestic tale of the night Yan's hair was as it never shall be again. This is a lovely old tale, which I haven't yet told.

Yan may be reading this and squirming in his seat, but it had to be done. Fret not, dear Yan, for this ordeal counts as an April Fools day joke. You are safe. Never again.

Once upon a time, there was a young man named Yan. He was a soulful fellow with a kind heart. He often sighed but would yield to his female friends and their strange desires to mess with his locks. One of these friends was I.

It was a dark and stormy night at my house. All were present who wished to participate in the evil deed. We conversed, discussing our plan. I thought for a moment, at a loss at what could be done. What would be fun? Suddenly a bottle in the cabinet spoke to me.

It said, "My dearest, it is I you seek. From the first day you bought be in England, this I knew to be my destiny. I am but a bottle of strange hair product, but when on the hair of Yan I will spill my secrets before you all."

"But how shall we proceed with such a deed," asked Lizzy-Anne.

"It is easy," replied the bottle, with a tone so sly. "You must lie. You must say not a word of my true identity, but instead that I am a mere bottle of jell. You must apply me without laughing, just as if everything was normal. Then, when all is well you must take the hairdryer and set me in my place. I will then wreak the havoc you long for in your hearts."

And so we followed the advice. Pun kept a straight face, and the rest of us went about our work atop Yan's un-suspecting head.

Yan’s hair turned pink!

When at last our true intent was revealed, Yan's surprise filled us with delight. It only took a shower to remove it, the floor awash with pink sparkles, but it was a night to remember. Yan will no doubt be wary of us until the end of time, but it was meant to be. And the bottle of dye sang a mournful tune as he lay empty, but with his fate fulfilled.

The End